« Last post by marguk on Yesterday at 10:17:24 PM »
Gail - I've not read either of the books you mention so cannot comment on those. As with Ruthie and Lambie, this method seems to have struck a chord with me and the "decide what to keep" rather than what to discard approach seems to work.
My partner has not read the book and I doubt will ever do so, but as I have been sorting, things that belong to him have joined my own belongings. For instance, I put all the books, except for my craft books that are all on a separate shelf in my sewing room, in the lounge - this was to enable me to clean the bookcases. The pile of books included some that we both read and also those that are his technical or personal books. I cleaned down the bookcases and put all the children's books together. I did prune some of them but have left the majority for the grandchildren and will suggest to them that they may wish to sort them but I will not pressure them in to this as it is their choice. The books that we both read and my own books, I went through and decided which I would like to keep and put these back on the bookshelf. That left those that I now consider belong to my DH on the lounge floor and having left them there for a couple of days, I have noticed that he has moved a few back on to the bookshelf and others remained on the floor. I asked him if he wanted me to put them back and I was in absolute shock when he said, no, what was left could go to the charity shop. He has also been tidying bits and pieces in other places without any prompting or pressure from me.
I am not sure why he is doing this as we are both hoarders but I seem to have turned a corner on keeping things that are meaningful for me and perhaps that is encouraging him to see that we do keep too much "stuff". Not sure if he will continue but I am certainly not pressuring him into anything.
Time spent sorting varies from day to day and depends on other activities. I think I am spending about an hour a day at the moment. However, like Ruthie, I have trays around the house that I drop similar things into as I come across them. I do then take a tray now and then and sort through it if I am having a cup of tea and tidy it out. I'll immediately discard anything that I know I will not keep, even if it isn't in the category that I am currently concentrating on. Other things that I cannot at the time make a decision about, I will leave in the tray and will consider with the rest of the category when I get to it. I have been amazed to find how many similar things are turning up in the trays and also how much more quickly I can make a decision on what I would like to keep. I think it will take me a year to get through the whole house but I am not in a rush - it has taken me a long time to get to this point and I will do a bit as and when I can. This is another area that differs from KonMari when the tidying is seen as a special event and should be done at one time. I couldn't physically cope with this and have so many other things demanding attention that it would not be possible for me to devote days at a time for it.
It is working for me and I am definitely in a happier place than when I first started but I can see that it will not be a solution for everyone - as Lambie says, each to their own and enjoy your own way.
Ruthie's post has just overlapped with this one and the area that I am struggling with is clearing the donate items out - I have 5 more bags in the hall at the moment waiting to go and it is holding me back from doing more but I cannot take them to the charity shop until next week at the earliest now. I do agree that it would be really helpful to clear more quickly and physically see the difference.